If you wonder if he's gone to Heaven or Hell — rest assured he will check out them both, find out which one Richard Milhous Nixon went to — and go there.-Ralph Steadman on Dr. Hunter S. Thompson
Greetings, good and gentle readers! Fulsome, abject apologies for the extended absence...I grovel. I abase myself before you.
Don't think that I didn't hear the crickets chirping on this blog, too. I was troubled by my lack of time and energy for this last month. I'll only accept responsibility for February...
January was a blur with client visits, consultations, travel and other related insanity.
Is all forgiven? Good. Let's resume class then, shall we?
Whom does the Guerrilla Director admire? I admire visionaries, rebels, raconteurs, enlightened rogues and originals...one man in particular fits all of these.
Dr. Hunter S. Thompson. One of a few true American originals.
While there are some who claim to live life on their own terms, 99% of those (yours truly, included) are chained and restrained. By marriage. By societal norms. By professional concerns (licensure, fear of censure or censorship). By the almighty dollar.
HST bowed to none.
Jail, unemployment, divorce, poverty. He regarded these as fleeting...like farts in a whirlwind.
He didn't go out of his way to be a bastard. He simply went out of his way to go his own way.
He carried the colors for the first wave of the baby boomers to hit the shores of mortality a few years back. Actually, he was born before the official begin of the BB generation, but immersed himself in the cultures that enveloped the BBs during the '60s, '70s and those weird years in-between.
In 2005, he left this world with a gunshot described by his son (who was in the other room) as sounding like a book hitting the floor. The poetry of the description would have pleased HST, exiting the same way he travelled.
His own way.
The last sound of the writer was that of a book hitting the floor.
His funeral was the subject of a film by Wayne Ewing entitled "When I Die." It followed the planning of HST's farewell service and the Gonzo Memorial. I highly recommend it for anyone as a study of this up and coming tsunami of clients following in HST's footsteps: Self-motivated, self-indulgent people looking for their own Gonzo Memorial.
I've encountered a few of these in my time.
One lady asking to be scattered off the top of the Stratosphere Hotel and Casino in Vegas.
Another wanting a horse-drawn funeral procession, complete with police escort (on horseback, of course).
A gentleman requesting a traditional Viking funeral.
These are true gems, but you'll also meet more common folks like the wonderful woman who wanted the full traditional service with a $5500.00 solid cherry casket which she cremated her husband in after all was finished. (The hand-wringing rube I worked for at the time was actually UPSET by this. Say what? Don't we wish all cremation families chose full traditional services with a solid cherry casket?)
What would your response be to these folks? Laughter, I hope. As in "laughing all the way to bank."
You see, these good people want what they want, and they are NOT, I repeat NOT afraid of a big tab for their requests. They are also not afraid to search outside of their neighborhood for a provider to give them what they want.
Are you the director to tell them no? Or are you the go-to guy who says "let's see how far we can go with it!"
The good news for you, guerrilla, is that we have so many, many lazy, stupid and unoriginal colleagues in this business who would much rather say "no" and go back to their newspaper or computer Solitaire. You are very likely to get the call instead of them.
The guy who says no quickly fades from memory. The go to guy is the first one to get the call from the family friend who loved what they saw at HST-style service.
Don't forget to laugh on the way to the bank.
Yours in profit,
Dan
PS - Here's a little HST to send us out right:
"Walk tall, kick ass and take no guff from those swine..."
Thanks, Hunter. That's about all for now.
D
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Sunday, January 6, 2008
Boost Your Profit by Thousands With A Phone Call!
Happy new year to all!
I hope you've tossed your resolutions to the wayside already...heaven knows I have!
2008 has officially begun. This is the year for the brave souls to really knuckle under and push their businesses beyond all expectations...make more money...make your competitor sweat bullets on sleepless nights...
2008 is the year of the guerrilla!
The guerrilla mindset dropkicks convention and academia right in the pants and opts for the proven, the bold and the innovative.
Your first step?
Stop repeating past mistakes. Don't throw good money after bad. Sacrifice the lamb of ego to the gods of profit!
How does one do that?
Take a good hard look at what marketing tools you employ. Ads, spots, mailings, etc. What's working for you? What isn't?
Immediately drop any piece that you cannot measure results from!
The largest, most offensive WASTE of your marketing dollar?
That innocuous little publication known as the...the phone book.
There are a boatload of "experts" out there that continue to make money for themselves (and Yellow Page sales reps) by pushing this reference book as a sales tool for funeral homes.
Obviously, anyone who has spent any sort of time in this field knows, or should know, that the Yellow Pages is not effective as a marketing tool for a fully-branded funeral home. Unless your firm is the new kid on the block, stop wasting your money! Large ads in the Yellow Pages only benefit the people who sell you the ads!
Last year, I was contacted by one of these "experts" who claimed he could make my Yellow Pages ad into a virtual ATM for the funeral home.
Ummm...yeah. Okay. So give me the name of one of your funeral home clients who has used your ideas and benefitted from it.
Never heard from him again.
People outside of the funeral industry think that you can market us like plumbers, or lawyers or roofers.
CLUELESS! Each and every one of them!
You know why? They've never spent one day in the practical reality inside of a funeral home.
Unless you've spent some time in this field (not simply as an interested observer from the sidelines) you really have no idea what it takes to market a funeral home.
My personal favorite of the clueless options is their suggestion of a special phone number (just for their ad!) so you can track the number of calls generated by that ad.
Now, why in the hell would you want to risk confusing customers who have read/heard/dialed your current number already by introducing a completely different number into the equation?
And even if you do use that different number, is there any reliable way to measure if those calls have translated into sales? Not that I've seen!
And here's what really tells me how much is overspent on Yellow Pages ads...
Go look up Coca-Cola's phone number...or Home Depot....or McDonald's....IN THE YELLOW PAGES.
Bet I can guess what you found: A small ad or in-column listing. Their other marketing efforts support them, not the Yellow Pages. So do yours!
Make sure you have a PRESENCE in the Yellow Pages...a small in-column ad or even a bold listing if you can swing it. Your customers are not going to trade your superior service and comfortable familiarity for your competitor's big pretty ad.
Let him waste his money. Don't let your ego confuse the issue. Call your local Yellow Pages rep and thank him kindly, but for the next directory, you're going to keep it small and simple.
You've just added thousands to your profits!
You're welcome!
I hope you've got fire in your belly for the coming year! It's going to be your best ever!
Here's to us in 2008!
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
PS-I wanted a little extra proof about this theory...I looked up the phone company in their own directory and guess what...a small in-column ad!
Tells you something, doesn't it?
PPS-Church bulletins are highly suspect as far as marketing value, too! There are more powerful ways to connect with that church body than a dinky, useless ad just BEGGING to be ignored!
I hope you've tossed your resolutions to the wayside already...heaven knows I have!
2008 has officially begun. This is the year for the brave souls to really knuckle under and push their businesses beyond all expectations...make more money...make your competitor sweat bullets on sleepless nights...
2008 is the year of the guerrilla!
The guerrilla mindset dropkicks convention and academia right in the pants and opts for the proven, the bold and the innovative.
Your first step?
Stop repeating past mistakes. Don't throw good money after bad. Sacrifice the lamb of ego to the gods of profit!
How does one do that?
Take a good hard look at what marketing tools you employ. Ads, spots, mailings, etc. What's working for you? What isn't?
Immediately drop any piece that you cannot measure results from!
The largest, most offensive WASTE of your marketing dollar?
That innocuous little publication known as the...the phone book.
There are a boatload of "experts" out there that continue to make money for themselves (and Yellow Page sales reps) by pushing this reference book as a sales tool for funeral homes.
Obviously, anyone who has spent any sort of time in this field knows, or should know, that the Yellow Pages is not effective as a marketing tool for a fully-branded funeral home. Unless your firm is the new kid on the block, stop wasting your money! Large ads in the Yellow Pages only benefit the people who sell you the ads!
Last year, I was contacted by one of these "experts" who claimed he could make my Yellow Pages ad into a virtual ATM for the funeral home.
Ummm...yeah. Okay. So give me the name of one of your funeral home clients who has used your ideas and benefitted from it.
Never heard from him again.
People outside of the funeral industry think that you can market us like plumbers, or lawyers or roofers.
CLUELESS! Each and every one of them!
You know why? They've never spent one day in the practical reality inside of a funeral home.
Unless you've spent some time in this field (not simply as an interested observer from the sidelines) you really have no idea what it takes to market a funeral home.
My personal favorite of the clueless options is their suggestion of a special phone number (just for their ad!) so you can track the number of calls generated by that ad.
Now, why in the hell would you want to risk confusing customers who have read/heard/dialed your current number already by introducing a completely different number into the equation?
And even if you do use that different number, is there any reliable way to measure if those calls have translated into sales? Not that I've seen!
And here's what really tells me how much is overspent on Yellow Pages ads...
Go look up Coca-Cola's phone number...or Home Depot....or McDonald's....IN THE YELLOW PAGES.
Bet I can guess what you found: A small ad or in-column listing. Their other marketing efforts support them, not the Yellow Pages. So do yours!
Make sure you have a PRESENCE in the Yellow Pages...a small in-column ad or even a bold listing if you can swing it. Your customers are not going to trade your superior service and comfortable familiarity for your competitor's big pretty ad.
Let him waste his money. Don't let your ego confuse the issue. Call your local Yellow Pages rep and thank him kindly, but for the next directory, you're going to keep it small and simple.
You've just added thousands to your profits!
You're welcome!
I hope you've got fire in your belly for the coming year! It's going to be your best ever!
Here's to us in 2008!
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
PS-I wanted a little extra proof about this theory...I looked up the phone company in their own directory and guess what...a small in-column ad!
Tells you something, doesn't it?
PPS-Church bulletins are highly suspect as far as marketing value, too! There are more powerful ways to connect with that church body than a dinky, useless ad just BEGGING to be ignored!
Friday, December 21, 2007
Merry Christmas to all~A gift for you!
Well, after a month of cloying ads on TV and the three songs that make me truly hate Christmas (that Paul McCartney nonsense-the worst Christmas song ever, the hippopotamus drivel and Eartha Kitt's "Santa Baby") and make me reconsider Festivus as a viable holiday alternative...we're almost there...almost out of the woods.
I plan to watch my favorite Christmas movies this weekend: "The Ref" with Denis Leary, "Scrooged" with Bill Murray (a guilty pleasure with great subtext about the value of a charitable heart) and of course "Christmas Vacation." I highly recommend all three!
No "It's a Wonderful Life" for this cowboy...I guess I'm too cynical.
Cynicism aside, I do believe in giving at this time of year. Happy giving. Fearless giving. True gifts of love and kindness. True giving usually means awkward reactions when I get overwhelming gratitude, because I long ago learned that it's not about the reward, it's about the gift.
I have a gift for you, good and patient reader. You've stuck by me through the good posts and bad, and now comes the time for my thanks to you. Send me the ad of your choice to dan@guerrilladirector.com for a free evaluation and personal recommendation to power it up. No hooks. No catches. No obligation.
Yellow pages ad? Bring it on. Newspaper? You bet. A radio spot? Fire away!
I'll analyze, ponder and offer suggestions for tweaks to increase their drawing power.
Free. Costs you nothing. Zip. Nada. My gift to you for putting up with my someetimes aimless mental meanderings.
As you ponder your personal and business course of action for the new year, remember that what you give away is returned to you tenfold. The Karmic Law of the Universe which you find translated into every language and every religious text in some manner or another.
You know what that means.
It means that it's true.
No one has yet found an argument against the virtues of charity, mercy and kindness. The key is your motivation. Give for the sake of giving, not for the sake of what you'll get in return. The less you expect, the more you will receive.
That's the crazy, enigmatic part of the law. And the longer I'm alive, the stronger and truer the law fixes itself. I adhere to it faithfully.
And that means you can send me whatever you want, and I'll get it back to you-better, stronger, faster-the Six Million Dollar Ad. It will be razor sharp and ready for you to take aim on 2008 as THE force to be reckoned with in your market.
My gift to you.
Don't wait. The first ones in line always get the best ride!
Merry Christmas. I wish to all of you and your families a peaceful, memorable and blessed holiday. I bid you the best tidings for a prosperous 2008.
Thank you, friends. You've made 2007 my most successful year ever. I hope to make 2008 YOUR most successful year ever.
Warmly,
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
dan@guerrilladirector.com
PS~Want me to review and comment on your website? Send me the address to my email. Free for the remainder of the year!
I plan to watch my favorite Christmas movies this weekend: "The Ref" with Denis Leary, "Scrooged" with Bill Murray (a guilty pleasure with great subtext about the value of a charitable heart) and of course "Christmas Vacation." I highly recommend all three!
No "It's a Wonderful Life" for this cowboy...I guess I'm too cynical.
Cynicism aside, I do believe in giving at this time of year. Happy giving. Fearless giving. True gifts of love and kindness. True giving usually means awkward reactions when I get overwhelming gratitude, because I long ago learned that it's not about the reward, it's about the gift.
I have a gift for you, good and patient reader. You've stuck by me through the good posts and bad, and now comes the time for my thanks to you. Send me the ad of your choice to dan@guerrilladirector.com for a free evaluation and personal recommendation to power it up. No hooks. No catches. No obligation.
Yellow pages ad? Bring it on. Newspaper? You bet. A radio spot? Fire away!
I'll analyze, ponder and offer suggestions for tweaks to increase their drawing power.
Free. Costs you nothing. Zip. Nada. My gift to you for putting up with my someetimes aimless mental meanderings.
As you ponder your personal and business course of action for the new year, remember that what you give away is returned to you tenfold. The Karmic Law of the Universe which you find translated into every language and every religious text in some manner or another.
You know what that means.
It means that it's true.
No one has yet found an argument against the virtues of charity, mercy and kindness. The key is your motivation. Give for the sake of giving, not for the sake of what you'll get in return. The less you expect, the more you will receive.
That's the crazy, enigmatic part of the law. And the longer I'm alive, the stronger and truer the law fixes itself. I adhere to it faithfully.
And that means you can send me whatever you want, and I'll get it back to you-better, stronger, faster-the Six Million Dollar Ad. It will be razor sharp and ready for you to take aim on 2008 as THE force to be reckoned with in your market.
My gift to you.
Don't wait. The first ones in line always get the best ride!
Merry Christmas. I wish to all of you and your families a peaceful, memorable and blessed holiday. I bid you the best tidings for a prosperous 2008.
Thank you, friends. You've made 2007 my most successful year ever. I hope to make 2008 YOUR most successful year ever.
Warmly,
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
dan@guerrilladirector.com
PS~Want me to review and comment on your website? Send me the address to my email. Free for the remainder of the year!
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
A Thousand Little Details....
Fearless, yet Gentle Readers:
I wrote the following piece as a submission to a publication that never acknowledged its receipt. After sending a follow up to see if they had received it, or if it needed revision, I got no reply. So, rather than "letting the words of my youth slip away" as our pig-tailed friend Mr. Nelson sings, here ya go!
A Thousand Little Details...
How Superior Attitude and Attention Wins You Customers Forever
My four year old daughter is exceptionally brave. I took her to a local amusement park and she demanded to ride the weather-beaten wooden coaster tucked away at the back end of the park.
Autumn’s first leafy victims skittered across the asphalt as I explained how fast the ride went, the ups and downs and sharp turns…all in a vain attempt to turn her interest to something kinder to my stomach.
No such luck.
Fortunately, short lines helped keep my thoughts moving, and as I stared up at the flaking wooden beams, wondering silently about the number of termite family hoedowns currently in progress as well as thoughts of the young (possibly hung over) college kid who did the maintenance check on it this morning. I gazed at an ungodly number of screws and bolts that were laying on the ground around the concrete support base. And I thought to myself, “The difference between this being a good experience and a nightmare is a thousand little details.”
Details like how many of those screws had been replaced. And the (hopefully) sharp eyes of the person who inspected it in the morning before the first riders were allowed on.
Your own customer’s experience is also completely dependent on a thousand little details. Details that are mostly ignored by low-end price competitors. I spoke with owner of a discount operation here in my hometown who told me about all the things he does “just like the big guys.”
Like what? Put the body in a casket? Drive the hearse to the cemetery and put the casket in the ground? Maybe. But that’s where the similarity ends.
I vividly recall another thing he told me. “I don’t offer any of that hand-holding baloney.”
Ah yes, nothing repels customers more during a time of loss and sorrow like comfort and guidance.
A quick check of the phone book shows me this guy’s no longer in business. His original business name included the phrase “removal” in it. “Removal?”
Stump removal? How about refuse removal? Personally, I can’t fathom hiring a “removal” firm to take care of my mom. Especially one who’s only concern is their convenience and your checkbook. I feel better after the “removal” of his company listing from the phone book.
Your company name is a big detail to your customer. Don’t try to be cute or preachy…both can sabotage your marketing efforts.
A thousand little details. This is where you get to shine. You are in the business of holding hands with your customer. Be ready, be knowledgeable and be genuine. Listen to those little stories that families often share during the course of an arrangement. That’s where you get most of those little details. A favorite song. (For .99 with iTunes you can make a whammy of an impression on a family by downloading a song and burning a CD to play at the visitation or service.) Favorite foods, holidays or poems. Beloved scripture readings or ministers. (Do you REALLY want to score points? Do some homework to try and locate that long ago priest or minister that they loved so much.)
A thousand little details. Like your manicured grounds and landscape. Come on, people. Curb appeal is a very, very powerful marketing tool. An immaculate, pleasantly aromatic facility. Invest in some high-quality scented oil air fresheners that you plug in. (They’re about $4 to $6 at the store.) Food scents (like apple-cinnamon) are particularly good.
A thousand little details. A friendly, professional voice answering your phone. Warm and engaging greeters to direct families and their visitors. High-quality, attractive motor equipment (yours or rented) can make powerful impressions on families and attendees. The more professional, thoughtful and distinctive image you convey, the smaller your marketing budget needs to be.
Got your holiday shopping done yet? Give yourself (and your business) a gift this year. The gift of profits beyond expectations. The gift of unprecedented success. The gift of focused fearless leadership. The gift of an on-site visit from the Guerrilla Director. Call me at 314-640-9770 for details.
Cheers!
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
I wrote the following piece as a submission to a publication that never acknowledged its receipt. After sending a follow up to see if they had received it, or if it needed revision, I got no reply. So, rather than "letting the words of my youth slip away" as our pig-tailed friend Mr. Nelson sings, here ya go!
A Thousand Little Details...
How Superior Attitude and Attention Wins You Customers Forever
My four year old daughter is exceptionally brave. I took her to a local amusement park and she demanded to ride the weather-beaten wooden coaster tucked away at the back end of the park.
Autumn’s first leafy victims skittered across the asphalt as I explained how fast the ride went, the ups and downs and sharp turns…all in a vain attempt to turn her interest to something kinder to my stomach.
No such luck.
Fortunately, short lines helped keep my thoughts moving, and as I stared up at the flaking wooden beams, wondering silently about the number of termite family hoedowns currently in progress as well as thoughts of the young (possibly hung over) college kid who did the maintenance check on it this morning. I gazed at an ungodly number of screws and bolts that were laying on the ground around the concrete support base. And I thought to myself, “The difference between this being a good experience and a nightmare is a thousand little details.”
Details like how many of those screws had been replaced. And the (hopefully) sharp eyes of the person who inspected it in the morning before the first riders were allowed on.
Your own customer’s experience is also completely dependent on a thousand little details. Details that are mostly ignored by low-end price competitors. I spoke with owner of a discount operation here in my hometown who told me about all the things he does “just like the big guys.”
Like what? Put the body in a casket? Drive the hearse to the cemetery and put the casket in the ground? Maybe. But that’s where the similarity ends.
I vividly recall another thing he told me. “I don’t offer any of that hand-holding baloney.”
Ah yes, nothing repels customers more during a time of loss and sorrow like comfort and guidance.
A quick check of the phone book shows me this guy’s no longer in business. His original business name included the phrase “removal” in it. “Removal?”
Stump removal? How about refuse removal? Personally, I can’t fathom hiring a “removal” firm to take care of my mom. Especially one who’s only concern is their convenience and your checkbook. I feel better after the “removal” of his company listing from the phone book.
Your company name is a big detail to your customer. Don’t try to be cute or preachy…both can sabotage your marketing efforts.
A thousand little details. This is where you get to shine. You are in the business of holding hands with your customer. Be ready, be knowledgeable and be genuine. Listen to those little stories that families often share during the course of an arrangement. That’s where you get most of those little details. A favorite song. (For .99 with iTunes you can make a whammy of an impression on a family by downloading a song and burning a CD to play at the visitation or service.) Favorite foods, holidays or poems. Beloved scripture readings or ministers. (Do you REALLY want to score points? Do some homework to try and locate that long ago priest or minister that they loved so much.)
A thousand little details. Like your manicured grounds and landscape. Come on, people. Curb appeal is a very, very powerful marketing tool. An immaculate, pleasantly aromatic facility. Invest in some high-quality scented oil air fresheners that you plug in. (They’re about $4 to $6 at the store.) Food scents (like apple-cinnamon) are particularly good.
A thousand little details. A friendly, professional voice answering your phone. Warm and engaging greeters to direct families and their visitors. High-quality, attractive motor equipment (yours or rented) can make powerful impressions on families and attendees. The more professional, thoughtful and distinctive image you convey, the smaller your marketing budget needs to be.
Got your holiday shopping done yet? Give yourself (and your business) a gift this year. The gift of profits beyond expectations. The gift of unprecedented success. The gift of focused fearless leadership. The gift of an on-site visit from the Guerrilla Director. Call me at 314-640-9770 for details.
Cheers!
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
Monday, December 3, 2007
Has Your Tiger Died?
Greetings Friends!
Alas! Ol' Man Winter has seized us, not to relent until the Great Axis rotates and the Druids do the ancient equinox dance...
I find myself (as all do now and then) with an increasing amount of life frustration. And then I reread a mailing from a man I've met, yet listened to many times. The wonderful thing about reading something like this is that no matter how many times you read, it has the same effect...
It's something akin to throwing fresh coal on a dwindling fire...a long burn with intense heat.
We all need some extra heat, especially now - to kick Winter in the pants.
I was speaking with a funeral home owner yesterday who responded to my inquiry about the quality of his business year with the words "business was flat, no gain but no loss." And he seemed to be absolutely positively fine with that!!!!!
In fact you could hear the relief in his voice that he didn't go backwards.
How sad.
Are you satisfied with mediocrity?
Have you conceded defeat to being just average?
I have not. Acceptance of mediocrity is contemptible. This owner could be seizing a once in a lifetime opportunity to fairly and honestly rip market share from another larger firm on the cusp of making a grave business mistake...and yet, he's content to do what he's always done.
Contentment with being average will be on the cause of death line of your firm's death certificate. Contributing factors will include fear, laziness and failure to seize golden opportunities like the one he is passing on.
Don't play Salieri to your competitor's Mozart. BE Mozart for God's sake!
Want some free fuel for your fire? Email me at dan@guerrilladirector.com and I'll forward something to you that will stoke those flames, I promise you!
The title of this post might give some of the more astute readers a hint!
Don't let your fire grow dim....if there's embers there can be success!
You aren't giving up your business and prosperity up to the Ol' Man Winter of Mediocrity, are you?
If so, let me know. Those of us with guts will sing the Requiem for you.
Toasting your success!
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
PS - Need your preneed sales team fired up too? Still getting hung up on while cold-calling? That's a shame. I can help.
PPS - Attention blog readers...your chance to take advantage of the 2008 12 Month Profit Makeover plan is just about gone. So much for you to gain for only $150 a month. How can you lose with that? If the ideas you gain only net you a couple of extra funerals, you're on the winning side. But I'll bet if you use all of these tactics and bonuses offered in this plan YOU WILL BE WONDERING WHAT THE HELL TO DO WITH ALL THE MONEY BY THIS TIME NEXT YEAR! The cost of the plan is so much less than the cost of doing nothing.
I'm going to update you regularly with the owner who I spoke of in this post. Doing nothing is going to cost him dearly...because a more savvy owner is circling like a shark, more than happy to do what the other won't.
dan@guerrilladirector.com
Alas! Ol' Man Winter has seized us, not to relent until the Great Axis rotates and the Druids do the ancient equinox dance...
I find myself (as all do now and then) with an increasing amount of life frustration. And then I reread a mailing from a man I've met, yet listened to many times. The wonderful thing about reading something like this is that no matter how many times you read, it has the same effect...
It's something akin to throwing fresh coal on a dwindling fire...a long burn with intense heat.
We all need some extra heat, especially now - to kick Winter in the pants.
I was speaking with a funeral home owner yesterday who responded to my inquiry about the quality of his business year with the words "business was flat, no gain but no loss." And he seemed to be absolutely positively fine with that!!!!!
In fact you could hear the relief in his voice that he didn't go backwards.
How sad.
Are you satisfied with mediocrity?
Have you conceded defeat to being just average?
I have not. Acceptance of mediocrity is contemptible. This owner could be seizing a once in a lifetime opportunity to fairly and honestly rip market share from another larger firm on the cusp of making a grave business mistake...and yet, he's content to do what he's always done.
Contentment with being average will be on the cause of death line of your firm's death certificate. Contributing factors will include fear, laziness and failure to seize golden opportunities like the one he is passing on.
Don't play Salieri to your competitor's Mozart. BE Mozart for God's sake!
Want some free fuel for your fire? Email me at dan@guerrilladirector.com and I'll forward something to you that will stoke those flames, I promise you!
The title of this post might give some of the more astute readers a hint!
Don't let your fire grow dim....if there's embers there can be success!
You aren't giving up your business and prosperity up to the Ol' Man Winter of Mediocrity, are you?
If so, let me know. Those of us with guts will sing the Requiem for you.
Toasting your success!
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
PS - Need your preneed sales team fired up too? Still getting hung up on while cold-calling? That's a shame. I can help.
PPS - Attention blog readers...your chance to take advantage of the 2008 12 Month Profit Makeover plan is just about gone. So much for you to gain for only $150 a month. How can you lose with that? If the ideas you gain only net you a couple of extra funerals, you're on the winning side. But I'll bet if you use all of these tactics and bonuses offered in this plan YOU WILL BE WONDERING WHAT THE HELL TO DO WITH ALL THE MONEY BY THIS TIME NEXT YEAR! The cost of the plan is so much less than the cost of doing nothing.
I'm going to update you regularly with the owner who I spoke of in this post. Doing nothing is going to cost him dearly...because a more savvy owner is circling like a shark, more than happy to do what the other won't.
dan@guerrilladirector.com
Monday, November 26, 2007
PASSION=PROFITS!
Have you recovered from the caloric orgy of the holiday yet? (Not me, not even close!)
If you can (and what the hell...I did!) pull yourself from the Stovetop Stuffing stupor and ease your mind back into business and your plans for the coming year...
A couple of weeks ago, I made a bold invitation...to which I've had bold replies of interest. I've put together a PDF brochure to send out to those of you who are interested in learning more about putting the milk back in your cashcow in 2008!
And you know who you are!!
I'm very excited to share this with all of you. I'm excited to know that there is still passion amongst you for what you do. Those with passion will not only survive, but thrive and prosper!
If you're ready, I'll teach you:
*Powerful Marketing Strategies
*How To Make Your Advertising Hypnotic and Unforgettable!
*Techniques on Turning Your Customers into Raving Ambassadors Who Will Market Your Business In the Most Powerful and Effective Way!
*Methods of getting FREE PR, Publicity and Media Coverage
* and a lot more!
Prepare to be blown away!
Imagine what it will feel like as your business volume explodes!
Spots are limited, and blog readers qualify for a 50% discount...because you are a savvy and motivated bunch!
Here's to us in '08!
Warm regards,
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
PS - Send me an email if you want me to send you the brochure!
If you can (and what the hell...I did!) pull yourself from the Stovetop Stuffing stupor and ease your mind back into business and your plans for the coming year...
A couple of weeks ago, I made a bold invitation...to which I've had bold replies of interest. I've put together a PDF brochure to send out to those of you who are interested in learning more about putting the milk back in your cashcow in 2008!
And you know who you are!!
I'm very excited to share this with all of you. I'm excited to know that there is still passion amongst you for what you do. Those with passion will not only survive, but thrive and prosper!
If you're ready, I'll teach you:
*Powerful Marketing Strategies
*How To Make Your Advertising Hypnotic and Unforgettable!
*Techniques on Turning Your Customers into Raving Ambassadors Who Will Market Your Business In the Most Powerful and Effective Way!
*Methods of getting FREE PR, Publicity and Media Coverage
* and a lot more!
Prepare to be blown away!
Imagine what it will feel like as your business volume explodes!
Spots are limited, and blog readers qualify for a 50% discount...because you are a savvy and motivated bunch!
Here's to us in '08!
Warm regards,
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
PS - Send me an email if you want me to send you the brochure!
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Did You Know That Thanksgiving Brings You Wealth?
Here we are...Thanksgiving '07 already. How the time does fly! If you don't mind, I'm going to wax philosophic for this post...in a constructive and interesting way, I hope!
Thanksgiving. Thanks. Giving.
Let's focus on the first half of the term. Thanks. Gratitude. Appreciation.
No matter what your situation, you should be able to examine your life and find some aspects (if not most aspects) of your life to be grateful for. Love. Friendship. Career objectives being pursued and met. The smile of your son or daughter. The cold, wet nose of your four-legged pal. Hope for the future. All good things. By all means, the best of things.
Gratitude is a funny thing. The more you appreciate what you have, the richer you feel. The more thankful you are, the more good things that come your way. The Powers that be like to know that you respect, understand and care for everything they bestow upon you. By showing your gratification, it tells them that it's OK to send some more your way.
"Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others."
-Cicero
I know that there are times when I've felt overwhelmed by good fortune. I was truly and honestly grateful for everything coming my way...and then-
I grew complacent. Took everything for granted. Felt like I was owed something.
And then I knew scarcity, and the fear that comes with it.
Now the second part of the term - giving.
Any of us brought up in a Christian faith remember being told things like "The Lord loves a cheerful giver" and "Tithe faithfully, you'll be rewarded tenfold." Etc. etc.
The older I get, the truer those statements become. Not in the strictly literal translation of giving money to some particular religious institution, but tithing in the Karmic sense. Paying it forward. Random acts of kindness. The times I've enjoyed the most prosperity are the times I've been the most generous to the world around me.
Dropping coins into the red kettle at Christmas. Giving a sawbuck to the couple with the cardboard sign on the freeway off-ramp. Volunteering for something that is meaningful to YOU. Heartfelt generosity in all of its forms brings so much good back to you that it's almost immeasurable.
The key to this is your intention. I know I've probably been rooked into giving money to someone who didn't really need. They were just lazy or dishonest and I was an easy mark.
But here's the thing-I still did a good deed. The bad vibes come back on them, not me. And I'd rather give money to ten people who didn't really need than risk ignoring the one person who depended on my five dollars to eat that night, or to have a warm place to sleep.
SO for those few who are still left reading, who haven't given up on this yet, I'll answer the question "What the hell does this have to do with my making more money?!?"
Gentle reader, in order to restore your success or bolster and improve your success, you must realign yourself with the positive forces of life. Gratitude and generosity in honest everyday practice will bring what you desire in multitudes, my friend. Give, and ye shall receive.
As this holiday season begins...and this year of 2007 winds down, adjust you mindset back to the balance of give and take. Your bankbook will thank you for it.
Thanks. Giving. Thanks for giving me a chance to stand on the old soapbox. I'm grateful for all of you out there. I wish nothing but blessings and prosperity to you and yours for the Holiday Season and the coming year.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Warmly,
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
PS - I'm especially grateful to all of you who have contacted me and asked me to work with you for your business. Cheers to you, together 2008 should be our best year yet!
Thanksgiving. Thanks. Giving.
Let's focus on the first half of the term. Thanks. Gratitude. Appreciation.
No matter what your situation, you should be able to examine your life and find some aspects (if not most aspects) of your life to be grateful for. Love. Friendship. Career objectives being pursued and met. The smile of your son or daughter. The cold, wet nose of your four-legged pal. Hope for the future. All good things. By all means, the best of things.
Gratitude is a funny thing. The more you appreciate what you have, the richer you feel. The more thankful you are, the more good things that come your way. The Powers that be like to know that you respect, understand and care for everything they bestow upon you. By showing your gratification, it tells them that it's OK to send some more your way.
"Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others."
-Cicero
I know that there are times when I've felt overwhelmed by good fortune. I was truly and honestly grateful for everything coming my way...and then-
I grew complacent. Took everything for granted. Felt like I was owed something.
And then I knew scarcity, and the fear that comes with it.
Now the second part of the term - giving.
Any of us brought up in a Christian faith remember being told things like "The Lord loves a cheerful giver" and "Tithe faithfully, you'll be rewarded tenfold." Etc. etc.
The older I get, the truer those statements become. Not in the strictly literal translation of giving money to some particular religious institution, but tithing in the Karmic sense. Paying it forward. Random acts of kindness. The times I've enjoyed the most prosperity are the times I've been the most generous to the world around me.
Dropping coins into the red kettle at Christmas. Giving a sawbuck to the couple with the cardboard sign on the freeway off-ramp. Volunteering for something that is meaningful to YOU. Heartfelt generosity in all of its forms brings so much good back to you that it's almost immeasurable.
The key to this is your intention. I know I've probably been rooked into giving money to someone who didn't really need. They were just lazy or dishonest and I was an easy mark.
But here's the thing-I still did a good deed. The bad vibes come back on them, not me. And I'd rather give money to ten people who didn't really need than risk ignoring the one person who depended on my five dollars to eat that night, or to have a warm place to sleep.
SO for those few who are still left reading, who haven't given up on this yet, I'll answer the question "What the hell does this have to do with my making more money?!?"
Gentle reader, in order to restore your success or bolster and improve your success, you must realign yourself with the positive forces of life. Gratitude and generosity in honest everyday practice will bring what you desire in multitudes, my friend. Give, and ye shall receive.
As this holiday season begins...and this year of 2007 winds down, adjust you mindset back to the balance of give and take. Your bankbook will thank you for it.
Thanks. Giving. Thanks for giving me a chance to stand on the old soapbox. I'm grateful for all of you out there. I wish nothing but blessings and prosperity to you and yours for the Holiday Season and the coming year.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Warmly,
Dan Heaman, CFSP
The Guerrilla Director
PS - I'm especially grateful to all of you who have contacted me and asked me to work with you for your business. Cheers to you, together 2008 should be our best year yet!
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