Tuesday, August 24, 2010

The end of an era...

Greetings good readers,

Never one to ignore the blogical muse when she slaps me, I felt compelled to write this today.

Yesterday, I buried an old friend. Tom was instrumental in my formative years as a funeral apprentice. He taught me lot, both in what to do and what to never do.

He was the antithesis of the stuffy undertaker. He was big, loud and brash. He sang too loud at Masses, his blue eyes danced with mischief and when that was matched with one of his Cheshire grins, you knew you were in for trouble! He talked to himself a lot and had a nearly photographic memory for names, faces, and funeral details.

And most families loved him. Most.

Tom was very funny and charming at a time when most didn't expect wit and charm. It put some off, but for the rest Tom would be the funeral director of choice the next time the family lost a loved one.

I saw Tom (or Big Tom, as most people knew him) turn a gaggle of elderly nuns into giggly schoolgirls with an inaudible (and probably bawdy) joke. I saw him hand a particularly crabby priest a business card that said "Jesus Loves You" on one side and "Everyone Else Thinks You're An Asshole" on the other side.

The priest loved it.

It became a long running joke with that priest and our firm to say "Jesus loves you" when he would get in the lead car on the way to the cemetery.

Tom also delighted in handing unsuspecting folks huddled around the outdoor ashtray urns a card that said "Thanks for smoking. From your local undertaker."

He would go to great lengths to get me (or others) to laugh at inappropriate times during a funeral. If you managed to hold it together, he would take that as the gauntlet being thrown down and redouble his efforts.

He got me once. ONCE.

Tom and I worked the front door one busy Sunday afternoon. An ancient gentleman slowly worked his way up the steps. Tom grandly swung the door open and said to the gent "Take all the time you need. I'm here 'til 5."
To which the man smiled and said "It's good to see you, Tom." Tom looked at him and his face changed.

Then Tom said, "Well, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was YOU. You old bastard, I thought you were dead." A hearty back pat, a Big Tom smile and a "Take care of yourself" from Tom as the man headed back to the visitation room. The old man seemed genuinely pleased and comforted that Tom recognized him.

"Who was that, Tom?" I was unsure that what I saw actually had just happened.

Tom stared far out the window and after a minute said, "I have no idea."

Tom's one downfall was never knowing when to be himself and when not to be himself. If Tom had known how to govern himself, he would have owned the city funeral business. He would have taken it by storm.

One of the most successful funeral home owners in this city is famous for joking and buying rounds of drinks at bars. Maybe it is some sort of St. Louis anomaly, but people seem to enjoy working with someone who isn't afraid to utilize some well-placed humor and irreverence.

What's the lesson here? Maybe it's time to channel a little Tom into your style. People love professionals, but people love REAL people more. Tom was real. He laughed with them, wept with them, he held the widow's hand during the walk to the gravesite. No one ever accused him of being a stuffy phony, which is a persona many suspect of our profession.

Be real. Add just a drop of Tom - but carefully. A little goes a long way.

Jesus loves you, Tom. Say Hi to Father Good for all of us down here.

Your friend,

Dan

PS - To all the readers out there, I want to share one more event - Tom taught me never to say no to a lunch invitation or a drink when proffered by a family. Never say no but find believable and genuine reasons to decline, because some ethnic groups in our city would take that as an egregious slap in the face to just say no. And you would have never got a dime of their business again...nor any of their friends or relatives.

That being said, true to form Tom and I accepted a family's lunch invitation and agreed that we would sit off to the side and slide quietly out after we had eaten.

So there we sat, enjoying the traditional south St. Louis church funeral lunch of rubbery roast beef and mostaccioli when he and I saw the children of the deceased all pick up their plates and walk over to our table to sit down and eat with us. What followed was a bit overwhelming, but many, many verbal thanks culminated in the family taking pictures with us...which they sent copies of in the long thank you letter that arrived a couple of weeks later.

Yeah. That really happened. And that was the Tom effect in purest form.

Happy August! I bid you all much success in the coming months.

D

PPS - Tom also taught me the only proper drink to allow a family to buy you was Scotch on the rocks. Good call, Tom!

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Discount vs. Differentiation

Good morning, Guerrillas!

One of my first clients was in an ultra-competitive market...really, imagine the World Series/Super Bowl/Lower Oakland Roller Derby all rolled in to one.

This firm was and continues to be world-class as a performer...as does their competitor. Each tiny bit of market share is hard won and guarded fiercely with politely bared fangs...

Even after an on-site visit, I could only make small suggestions to this firm, as they were already doing most of what I would have suggested them to do. They were already on their A-game...as was their competitor. They do have an edge that the competitor doesn't. They seek the counsel of almost every expert in the field that they can find.

Is this an inexpensive process? No. Does it pay dividends? It most certainly would have to or they wouldn't still do it. They are CONSTANTLY stretching, reaching and growing their arsenal on every front. They don't bring a knife to a gunfight. It keeps them from trying to compete on lower levels of the playing field, such as the time-honored tradition of discounting one's services to win a price shopper.

One of my earliest mentors in the business would snarl and gnash his teeth every time he would hear of our firm getting into a bidding war with another firm.

"What are we? Hookers? Car Salesmen?" He would growl, grumble and fume.

You see, we could honestly say that we did a superior job to our main competitor. But our management was absolutely petrified to stand up and say that to a price-shopper. Not even the old "remember-you get what you pay for" chestnut.

Don't discount yourself. Differentiate your firm. Make your customer experience superior, superlative and sublime. Fulfill needs that they don't even know they have. It isn't always in grand sweeping gestures. Disney doesn't create ONE BIG EVENT for you to experience to make you want to come back. They know that loyal raving fans are made when you string a bunch a small moments together that are made magical with just a little effort.

And Disney does not compete on price...you know that and I know that. They dominate by providing an unparalleled experience.

You too can dominate your market in the same way. Do all the things your competitor isn't able or willing to do. *WARNING* It means being extra perceptive and working your ass off. But it pays dividends in the end.

Hardcore price shoppers are usually not worth your time. They want every thing in the world and don't want to pay for it. Even if you make their experience breathtakingly memorable, some of them will still run to the guy down the street next time to save $100 bucks. In fact, I'm sure there are even a few of them that cannot believe that they can't find someone to pay THEM for the privilege of cremating their mama...

The new economy is creating a new breed of these shoppers. Some of these can be won by merely explaining how you are better and why the price variance is justified. But it can't be all talk. You got to prove to them that you were worth it. Do it! DANGER!!! If you really aren't worth the price difference, they'll sniff you out in a second and complain to a hundred people about how you lied and cheated just to get their money...

For many, price is merely an objection. Find out what is behind that objection and you can successfully negotiate around it. Maybe they had a bad experience with a competitor (a firm they may have used for generations) and are looking for an excuse to make a switch. Most people don't know how to go about making a move like this (especially with death imminent) so they fall back on price alone.

Don't be afraid to to use this line (or your own variation thereof) "I don't want you to make a mistake or choose the wrong funeral provider based just on price when there are so many other factors to consider as well (insert your reasoning here).

Plant the seed of doubt...but gently. Most have never given thought to the possibility that choosing the lowest cost provider might just be a grave mistake. (I'll groan for you.)

Handle these dealings delicately. Fight for the RIGHT price-shoppers, but learn to cut loose the ones who aren't worth your time and energy.

When you create the right experience for them, the next time their need rolls around, price should be much less of an issue for them.

As always, I toast your success and remain,

Dan Heaman, CFSP

PS - Down below look for a bit of advice for dealing with the bottom feeders of your marketplace competition...The Chicago Way: courtesy of Mr. Connery!

The Chicago Way